Archive for July, 2009
Am I Weird?
I make random noises at my desk, like loud sighs or grunts. I think my cubemate is weirded out by me
Am I Weird?
I told everyone in my office the ShamWow guy was dead. Everyone believed me.
Am I an Idiot?
I was on speaker phone with a manager and after making several demands for a case I’m working on it ended. Completely annoyed by all the extra work I was going to have to do I moaned “f****ck”…to which I only then noticed that I never hung up. I’ve been avoiding her since.
Can You Explain This to Me?
A guy I work with has a lazy eye. When talking to him, I am not sure if I should look him straight in the good eye or the bad eye. Or maybe I should just look up towards the ceiling where his lazy eye seems to be staring…
Am I Going Crazy?
My girlfriend is the worst person to sleep next to, she moans really loudly and sleeps on top of me. Is it ok if I kick her really hard?
Can You Explain This to Me?
Dear Grandma: Please stop asking me when I am going to settle down with a nice Jewish girl.
Am I Going to Hell?
I went into my boss’s office to put something on his desk, and knocked down a very expensive painting and broke the frame. I ran out of the room and pretended that the wind knocked it down.
Am I Going to Hell?
One time, I clogged my friend’s toilet and blamed it on his girlfriend. I then told him to pay more attention to what he’s feeding her.
Am I Weird?
My boyfriend broke up with me claiming “He needed some time to work on himself”. Why doesn’t he just admit it and say “I want to sleep that ugly secretary I work with.”
Am I Weird?
The other day I went to visit a friend who has a 4 year old. I asked the kid for a hug and he kicked me, screamed and ran the other way. Next time I stop by her house, I was thinking of wearing a Freddie Kruger mask and carrying a fake chainsaw. Should worry about my motherly instinct?
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