Archive for June, 2009
Am I Weird?
Weddings have the cheesiest music, but when Shout! comes on, I dance like a maniac… I just cant help myself.
Should I Be Worried?
I drink so many Monster Energy drinks, my piss is a greenish blue.
Does Anyone Else Do This?
Why do I always have to crap in Blockbuster Video store or a supermarket. It’s always in a place where there is never a bathroom.
What Happened Last Night?
So I had this really weird rash the other day in an uncomfortable spot. I got a little worried and went to go see my doctor. He took a look at it, said it could be allergies. He asked if I had used any condiments for anything other than my food. What??
Am I an Idiot?
I was late for work today. I pulled a sweater out of the dryer, threw it on, ran into work & walked to the front of a packed meeting. Half an hour later, someone whispered to me that I had something on my back. It was a pair of my thongs static clung to my sweater. I hate Mondays.
What is Wrong With Me?
I am not getting the facebook thing. I really do not care if someone just put up some curtains or loves rap or is having a really bad day. Plus, all my invitations seem to be from the creepy guys that I spent 4 years trying to avoid in college.
What is Wrong With Me?
I had a date last night and the guy was really hot and perfect in every way, but he said “mmmmmmm…” after every sentence. Like he would say, “Would you like a drink? mmmmmmm”. What is that all about? He asked if he could see me again & I could not help but say, “I don’t think so…mmmmmmmm.”
Does Anyone Else Do This?
After a particularly bad night of drinking, one of the first things I do to feel better is jump in the shower. And you feel so dehydrated that even though its warm and gross, your body craves liquid, so you open your mouth and drink from the showerhead. Anyone?
Am I Weird?
Why is it that whenever I am holding a hot cup of coffee and talking to someone, all I think about is what would happen if I dumped it in their face? Not like you hate the person, more just curious about how they’d react.
Am I an Idiot?
Why is it that everytime I don’t shave my legs I end up going on a date that ends up being a HOT date? And then feel dirty not because of the sex but because of my man legs?
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